Grief and Praise

How does one enter the cloud of witnesses – the saints gone before, already tested, tried, and purified? With a trail of grief mixed with praise.

Acia Rose was the mother of two boys, and many more who never took a breath. Her husband is a typical Karimojong man, lazy and unfaithful albeit very amiable whenever you met him. Her younger brother died of liver failure from drinking too much. She cared for his children before and after his death, as his wife was also a drunkard. Her neighborhood is known for its drinking establishments and fights. She was tree tall and stick thin as long as I knew her, constantly battling illness. She was one of the most patient, forgiving people I’ve ever known.

I met her early on in our time in Nakaale. She soon became my language teacher and village companion. She had worked with Martha Wright for numerous years and was well trained to understand Wazungu even when we didn’t make sense. Our weekly sessions became a highlight for me. Not only did she teach me the language, but also how a godly Karimojong woman lives, loves and loses. When she packed for an extended stay at the hospital she chose to bring a blanket, a basin and her Bible. She typified what it means to cover over with love and bear one another’s burdens. She was an example of submitting to crisis with grace and joy. She cared for every child that she knew – neighbor, relative, student, namesake, black or white. She hated to complain, and in the end, it killed her.

I remember one morning walking with her to Nakaale village. She likely had my eldest at a year old tied to her back. While we walked she regaled us with a local story-joke. Something about a mischievous cat and everyone dies in the end. She could hardly get the words out she was laughing so hard. Leah and I exchanged confused looks between trying to piece together the mix of Ugandan English and Karamojong and trying to figure out what was so funny. Africans take the maxim, “either you laugh or you cry” to a whole other level! She also told many jokes I did get, mostly recounting funny memories like when we ventured down a road turned mud pit, or when we piled way too many bodies into the vehicle to go to Nakapiripirit. She taught me riddles too – which thing eats food it cannot see? (the nose) Two grandmothers that climb up the mountain but refuse to reach the top? (ears) Which thing plants nails as it goes? (grass)

I received news of her death when we were in the US in the midst of VBS week at our church. She had been severely ill in April. All the tests were negative. The final diagnosis was malnutrition and general weakness. When we left mid-May she was home and improving. She could get out of bed and enjoy the sunshine. She was scolding and shepherding her nieces as usual. Neighbors and relatives were charged severely with making sure she ate. They promised me they would. So I left, hopeful and relieved. The news hit me like a hurricane. I couldn’t be there to mourn with the family. I felt like I had let her down, that maybe I could have done something if only I had been there. I knew even then those thoughts were lies. It is the Lord who knows our days and when they end. Maybe it was grace that removed me from an impossible situation. I know it is grace that has welcomed her home with her savior to a place without hunger, or sickness, or pain. And so it is with grief and praise that we commend Acia Rose into the gracious hands of our Lord.

Egori                                      I’m crying
Igorio, igorio                          We are crying, crying
Akaakone, ayai ayoŋ lore kon,     My friend, I am at your home
Nait imam iyoŋ nege                 But you are not here
Eboikini kwap ekitoe kon           I am sitting under your tree
Nait imam iyoŋ nege                 But you are not here
 
Egori                                      I’m crying
Igorio, igorio                          We are crying, crying
Ekeŋolikini ayoŋ iyoŋ                I am looking for you
Akian kaapei                            To chat together
Akyen kaapei                           To laugh together
Akisyom akirot ka Akuj kaapei    To learn the word of God together
Nait imam iyoŋ nege                 But you are not here
 
Egori                                      I’m crying
Igorio, igorio                          We are crying, crying
Ekeŋolikini ayoŋ iyoŋ                I miss you
Nait imam iyoŋ nege                 But you are not here
Eŋolikini apipil kon                   I am looking for your pain
Nait emam                               It is no longer
Eŋolikini atyonis kon                 I am looking for your difficulties
Nait emam                               They are no longer
Adaun jik                                They are finished completely
 
Epuri                                      I’m praising
Ipurio, ipurio                          We are praising, praising
Iyai nakuj ka Yesu                     You are in heaven with Jesus
Emam ŋican ama                      Where there are no problems
Emam apipil ama                      There is no pain
Emam edeke ama                      There is no sickness
Emam akoro ama                      There is no hunger
Ilakara iyoŋ tokona                   You are happy now
 
Egori, Epuri                             I am crying, praising
Igorio, ipurio                          We are crying, praising
Epuri Akuj                               I am praising God

*For any who knew Acia Rose, I encourage you to post your own stories and memories in the comments.